April 23 2010....

Currently its 3rd August 2010...

Seems like a while has passed since I have posted something here...

Just celebrated my BFF Ling's Bday~ Hope she stays happy always! Thanks to all my friends who are always here for me and making my life full of joy and laughter!!

Anyways... Recently thinking of changing a blogskin for my blog. haha~ Seems like a while since I have done anything here.. But ya know.. With work and fb and oxjs to keep mi entertained... Perhaps thats why I dun blog much anymore.

Recently I have been thinking of something Sandy told me when I casually mentioned about how SB told me stuffs recently. She said that when you talk to a person more, you might find feelings back for someone even though you have not seen the person for very long....

Makes me wonder if what SB told me reflects in this. Haha. But I guess its not applicable, cos even if he paints the sky and sun for me, the bottom line is that SB is still attached. I guess its not possible for one to have the best of both worlds. = ) I wonder if its because he thinks its wad he feels cos its the memories of me that he likes, but not the current me that he likes.

Anyways its hard for me to like another easily... So I gues it just adds to a spice in my life recently...

Received a letter from him last month. Haven opened it. Or should I say, I have no courage to open it. Perhaps you can say that I am trying to escape from it. I do admit in some ways that I am doing so. But I have no idea what should I do after opening it. Reply? Reply what? What can be said has already been said. Sighz....



Hope to update again soon!

HELP ME~~!~~~

Case: V Serious Bout of Food Poisoning
Reason: Unknown
Period: A Week
Work Days: 1.5 out of 5
Dietary Plan: 5 Days of Porridge + Chai Xim Guan

I have been hit with the worse food poisoning virus ever in my life. From repeated visits to the doctor due to throwing up and LS, plus having cold fits in the middle of the night, tell me please, I feel like I have suffered world war 4. Thanks Boss for being so understanding cos i missed soooo many days of work.


Hope i get well sooon!

Hmm... Sometimes I think that love can be the best thing to bring euu up up up high up in the sky, but sometimes love can also be the thing to bring euu down to hell..

Maybe we won't understand what is happenning, but when strong words are used and persistency is there, there are warning signs that something is v wrong.

Maybe we won't be the best person to talk to, but I want ya to know that we will def be arnd if euu need us.

But most importantly, I still believe that the best person who can save oneself is still yourself. Give yourself a chance to start anew. Sometimes when its over, it is over. Self delusion will only make your family and friends worried, causing yourself longer pain.

The same old sentence, if it is meant to be, it will be.

Its been a really really long while since I have been doing any blogging here. Have been debating to myself if I should close this blog down since the inital purpose is not arnd anymore as i dun do any blogging nowadays... But then still decided to keep in here as it still contains all the past few years of memories that my loved ones and I had.

This is a letter to someone, someone tt perhaps would never read...

Happy 2010! Time flies... 2 years have passed just like that. Perhaps we think of things too simply and perhaps we really thought that time would not be a problem when the faith remains there. I guess we have underestimated ourselves and we have eventually lost to time.

You are right, in life, sometimes we win sometimes we lose. We thought that just by visits and by letters would be enough to sustain the faith inside us, that nothing will change. Once, we were really connected and I still want to thank you for being the faith of pillar in me for the years. Honestly speaking, I have never really moved for the past years. I have never allowed myself to open up to others completely or have I ever allowed myself to show my real emotions. I thank you for it was you, who made me the more independent and more logical person I am inside of me. It was you who showed me that I am actually stronger than I think I can actually be.

This year, one of my resolution was to move on. It is not because when love is lost or anything, but perhaps at some point of time, I realise that what we are doing is not right. We are tying an invisible string to each other, and this string is cutting into our flesh. This string is the string that is actually hurting us. I still care for you, and I will still think everyday if u are doing okay inside, and if you are having good health or learning new things inside. However, the care that I have for you is more of a friend now. Perhaps at some point of time I realise that this might be the best arrangement that we should have. It is of cos, def not because I have fallen for someone new or anything. Frankly speaking, even if someone were to come along now, I would think alot alot alot even before anything, as I also have no idea if I have anything to offer anyone at this point of time.

I just hope that you will stay optimistic inside, and I believe the pot of rainbow will be waiting for you at the other end. Last but not least, hope that this unsent letter will somehow be transmitted to you. Cheers.

This is a slow morning... Just kill me when the day ends... haha

Dear friend,

I have thought about this for a long time before i decide how to go about eluating my thoughts to you. I even started recalling the time when we have just met, the many happy and the many sad times that we have shared together in this journey of our friendship. Trust me, I have really valued this friendship even though at times we might not be in close contact.

It is true, many a times we cannot turn back time and change alot of things, things have affected us and maybe in time, we will also change our thinking and change the way we react to things. I am glad that I have stormed with you through the hardest times of your life. Though i have to admit, many a times I did not really support your decision in some events but i believe that you will give it your best shot once u have decided upon something. Many a time you have proved me right. Even though i was deeply saddened at one day, that you misunderstood that we were saying bout her when we din and you sent mi a hurting sms after the outing at raffles place. I do not know if you rem, but i wanted to tell you all these while, we have never intended the topic to be a pun about her. But let bygones be bygones.

This time round, I only wish to let you know that i am not angry nor am i feeling any other feeling (Perhaps maybe onli a bit sighz...) haha. Because at the end of the day, it is your life and you choose how to live it. Just that it hurts to see you my dear friend, getting hurt again and again by the relationships that perhaps were not meant to be. I just hope that the dear friend i know will not tell me Story A in a day, and den story B the next. Just hope that like wad you can clearly see in the future for you, you can protect yourself a bit more, and fend yourself from being hurt. Knowing wad you want and doing it is different.

We really dun wish to see someone depressed again over relationships, but someone who can be really blissful and happy. We cannot stop u making decisions, but we hope that the decisions you make can really lead you to the future you look forward to.